When do dreams become reality?

I am full of hopes and dreams at the moment...that's partly why I'm starting this blog. I'm at a point in my life where the decisions I make are going to shape my future and have a big impact on my life. I have been on an emotional roller coaster for the past few weeks, torn between my current occupation and what I really want to do, along with all the usual stresses that come along with lovely life.

Dreaming is an amazing thing. I could not imagine life without having things to hope for and look forward to, to dream about and work towards. It's very important, otherwise what is the meaning of life? What is the purpose? We need to have things we love and goals for ourselves to fulfill our being! It feels so good to challenge ourselves and overcome the bumps in the road. But in saying that, it's not always easy!

Stepping out of your comfort zone and safety net is very scary. I'm finding that right now...but I've also come to realise that this is the time to do it. I am still young, I don't have big debts or responsibilities to hold me back. I'm still making who I am and shaping my life. I have the power to make it great or settle for where I'm at. I want to be great, I want to be well-known, I want to use my talents to make people feel good and to make people happy. I'm going to do it!

Lately I have felt very bored and unhappy about my current job situation...you can blame it on the economy or whatever it may be, but I don't feel like it's ever going to go back to the way it was. I am doing makeup, but not as much as I'd like to be. It's not fulfilling my creative outlet and there are a lot of politics and negative things going on that I'm not finding enjoyable. I keep telling myself that I'm lucky to have a steady, decent-paying job with the way the market has been - and that's true. But I also feel like I'm kidding myself because I'm not content there anymore. My job is monotonous to me when it should be fun and exciting.

That's why I want to become a freelance makeup artist! I have a lot of things I've been doing to work towards this choice: expanding and updating my portfolio, participating in wedding fairs, posting ads online, creating a website and groups on facebook, handing out business cards, getting inspired and taking in as much good information as I can to help market myself, networking with others in the industry, anything that can help me to get my name out there. My dream job would be to work with a photographer doing photoshoots...I love doing creative, artistic, avante-garde style makeup. I also love doing glam makeup and weddings, so my first goal is to fill my spring and summer with makeup bookings for the wedding season!

So far I have 8 potential weddings booked and I'm hoping after my first wedding show in about 2 weeks that I will have many more. I'm feeling very optimistic and excited for all of this, but at the same time a little nervous and scared. It works out that I have Thursday-Saturday off as my regular schedule, but eventually I'm going to have to tell my employer that I'm totally unavailable to cover shifts on Saturdays. That could pose a problem in the summertime because I'm needed quite a lot to cover shifts on Saturdays as my co-workers will take holidays and such. I know that I'm an adult now and should not be afraid to tell them this, but I have always been intimidated by management. Being assertive is not my strong suit as I'm a pretty easy-going individual. I have a feeling they won't be very happy with my decision.

The past 2 summers have made me determined to make a change in my career because I have been stuck working shifts that ruin my opportunity to do weddings outside of work, as well as working a lot more than I prefer at times because there has not been adequate coverage. And with the way business has been, and my poor luck, the shifts that I have covered have been slow and I really have not made any extra money off commission from weddings at my workplace; in fact, I barely had any brides booked in last summer! I want to do more weddings, I want to do more makeup, and I want to make more money! Most of all, I want to work for myself.

So, I'm confident that I can get my summer booked up completely, but my worry is that I may not have a steady job after that. Wedding season is mainly from about April-September, so where does that leave me for the rest of the year? Ideally, I'd love to be doing more photoshoots and creative makeup assignments to fill the space...but I'm not sure if that will come this soon. So, as I said, I'm feeling optimistic but I have some doubts and anxieties. All I can do is work towards this first goal and see what opportunities open up for me. Things seem to be working out so far; I just have to remain positive and goal-oriented. I can always fall back on my art (which I'm also trying to get going a little more...anyone want portraits done, contact me!).

I'm going to be successful...just you wait and see! I have a very strong support base and I love my husband, friends, and family for that. For now, it's my dream.

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